Like a total Prostitute
by xxxDuckiexxx
Summary: Rated T for now, May be changes later. I suck at summaries, but anyway: Matt has been watching the blonde prostitute for over a month now, when he suddenly get a chance to encounter him.
1. Chapter 1

Like a total prostitute.

Matt's PoV.

His eyes were blurry, and his legs couldn't manage to carry his body mass for much longer. When he hit the ground he scratched his knee, and whined like a little kid. He could take cuts and hits, but not a single scratch on his knee? I sighed and walked towards him, helped him up and let him rest on my shoulder for a while until I whispered.  
"Would you think I was a perv if I helped you?" The truth was that I was indeed a perv, and had had not so innocent thoughts about the blond. But, I would never dream of hurting or touching him while he was in this condition.  
"What the fuck" He muttered and nodded slightly, "Just … help me Ok?" His voice was lower than I had expected. I nodded, happy that he let me help him and that he didn't seem to recognize me. I, who had been watching him for more than a month and seen how he let his clients treat him. No!, I didn't actually saw them when they did it, but I could see the marks and scars on his arms and neck.

I supposed that this was a clients fault. He was beaten blue. He never questioned why I was there, in a small dark dirty alley or why I helped him. My apartment was only a few blocks away, but the blond was in no condition of walking. I helped him into my car, and then drove to my apartment. Neither of us did utter a word under the trip. The car silently stopped and I pulled out the key, rose from my seat and leaved the car to help him out. He was obviously in pain, and it tore my insides apart. I didn't even know his name, but to see anyone this hurt made me feel bad. Especially when I knew where he had gotten those injuries.

Finally entering my small smoky apartment I could feel him relax against my shoulder. He tore off his high leather boots took a couple of steps before falling down in the couch. I froze with my mouth slightly opened. From my angle all I could see was his ass, pouting slightly upwards due the arm rest of the couch. His leather pants were tight and made his ass look even better than it could without them, or could it? I didn't know back then. I cleared my throat and stripped myself of my jacket and shoes. By the smell of him he wasn't clean, and I doubted that he had taken a shower this week. "You want to clean yourself up?" I asked, because I was certainly not going to help him. Not that I didn't want to, I would love to, but I didn't want to entice my already strong instinct to rape him. Maybe not rape him, but you get the picture?

He nodded and got up on his feet, moving towards the bathroom. But I stopped him in the doorframe. "Wait.." I said, and I guess he heard my insecure tone because he smirked slightly. "Can you tell me your name?" I asked, not noticing that I was biting my lower lip.  
"Mello" He said and then closed the door between us.

I tasted the name in my thoughts before walking off from the door; I didn't want to catch myself at sneak-peeking. I rested on the couch, playing my DS. But my thoughts were elsewhere, they were with Mello. Mello, I tasted the name again and thought about the hundred times I've seen him walked up and down the street. He always returned to the same alley around 2 pm, and I figured that it was his so called home. That's how I could find him this night. I had grown worried when he left with a client in the early night, not returning for hours. I acted kind of stalkish, but what if I was? I didn't care, and I had no friends to tell me how wrong it was to stalk a prostitute that I didn't even know the name of. I never encountered him, and lucky for me he never mistook me for a client. At last I could hear how the shower stopped, and how Mello was moving again. I could feel my heart beat inside my striped shirt; I quickly turned my attention to the game to prevent the rapid heartbeats.

"Fuck!" I could hear him hiss, even though the door still was shut. " Hey! You the guy who helped me, can you help me again?" He asked, and I smirked. He didn't know my name, of course he didn't because I never told him. I rolled my eyes and knocked on the bathroomdoor. "Yeah?" I asked and Mello said, almost immediately. "Come in"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2.

Matts Pov.

With beating heartbeats I opened the door, which he obviously hadn't locked. Slowly I peeked in, saw Mello sitting on the toilet. He didn't have a shirt on and just a towel around his waist. Scars and marks covered his back, from the neck and down along the spine. I couldn't help but inhaling sharply when I saw one of the newest injuries. He begged me to wash his wound, and I obeyed. Mello clenched his teeth together when the lightening pain shot through his body.

"What's your name?" He mumbled when I moved away from his back, putting the final touch by putting a bandage over it. "Matt" I said, not telling Mello my original name since I hadn't used it for years.  
"Matt" I could tell he tasted my name, in the same way I had tasted his.

Even though I saw him, I couldn't really enjoy the scene before me. The scars ruined his otherwise perfect body. I realized I was staring, and hastily looked away. Nervous I started to bite my lip, turning against the door. "Uh, I.. I am sorry" I stuttered, immediately leaving the room. I shut the door behind me, and tried to slow down my racing heart which throbbed uncomfortable in my chest. I began walking towards my bedroom door, and picked up my DS when I passed the coffee table. The sheets were cold, the pillow were also. I shrugged, pulled the blanket closer around my body. I dived down under the beddings, turning my Ds on.

I couldn't concentrate at all. If I listened really carefully I could hear Mello in the other room. I held my breath as I heard how he sat down on the sofa, I never mistook that creak, sighed before he laid down with another creak. After a while it sounded like he was asleep. I sighed, and thought that I finally could get some sleep. Wrong. Somehow I caught my body when it was moving against the door, opened it slightly just enough to peek out. My heart was beating in an increasing rhythm.

He looked like an angel. The flawless face rested against one of the decorative pillows in the sofa, and the blonde hair swirled around his face. He was, just, beautiful. How old could he be? Not so old, I concluded when I referred to my own age. I was just 17 at the time, and had just lived in the smoky apartment for a half year. Before that? Before that I lived at an orphan, the Whammy's house here in America. Not that I want to brag, but I was actually the smartest kid there. But, I was rated third in all Whammy's. My roommate once told me that it existed many Whammy's houses all over the world, in England, Thailand, Denmark, France, Everywhere! Back then, I was kind of flattered to be rated third among all of them. I later realized that it was all thanks to my high computer skills. To be honest, I never considered myself as highly intelligent. I was, and am, just a computer freak to me and will always be.

"Mello" I whispered the name again, and tasted it. Why did it sound familiar? I took a couple of steps closer to the sleeping person in the sofa. I never had seen his face so peaceful before, not that I had had a long time with him, but anyway. I leaned forward and slightly touched his cheek with my stretched fingers. His skin was soft, and I smiled. I could feel him sigh under me, and I slowly moved away. Once again I went back to my bedroom, but this time I let the door open. It didn't take long for me to turn fast asleep, and I didn't even recognize the creaks from the sofa.

Mellos PoV.

As fast as he had leaved the room I opened my eyes, I had been awake since Matt had paid me a visit. But I pretended to be asleep through the whole visit, until now. I had a task. I knew that it wasn't likely that Matt was that '_Matt' _but I couldn't take the chance. Matt, rated third in all whammy's, right after myself. Alright!, right after myself until I leaved three years ago. Not that I cared if he was, but I concluded that it was very likely that he, if he was, wanted to take me back to whammy's or make me cooperate with Near. And if he wasn't, he maybe just was a pervert that wanted me in bed but was too shy to say it out loud.

I got up, ignored the pain which shot from my back up and along the spine, and slowly moved in the small apartment. Not that I had an apartment at all to brag with. I sighed again and stopped to think, were could he keep any document that proved that he was a whammy kid? The kitchen? I slowly peeked in, taking a few steps against the table. The table was messy, with papers, letters and bills all over the place. I rummaged around in the papers, finding a envelope. It was blank, except one small logo at the upper left corner. 'Whammy's'. I opened it, found a letter with just a few lines. It declared that L had been replaced, with my own worst rival, Near. It also came to my knowledge that Matt had helped him with a couple of hacking jobs.

So, it was Matt. Matt, the kid right after me, and if Roger spoke the truth, he had been raised in the American Whammy's house. But what did he want with me? I couldn't bear the feeling of not knowing. Matt seemed too harmless to kidnap anyone, and if he was sent by Near, why didn't he caught him earlier? I knew that he had been watching me for over a month, even though he might thought that he had gone unnoticed.

I settled my mind, and walked fast against his bedroom. Slowly opened the door and peeked in, he was fast asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3.

Matts Pov.

I didn't heard when he sneaked in, and didn't even notice him as he crawled up in the bed. I guess I slept very hard. I first awoke when I could feel him settle across my groin, and then I, still in my slumber, noticed how he fisted his hands in my shirt.

When he shook me I became clearly awake. "What-, What are you doing!?" I heard how my stressed voice hitched in the middle of the sentence, making me feel like a young teenager. "Do you know my true identity?" Mello asked in a huskily voice, and I could bet that he was threatening me. His eyes glimmered in the completely darkness. I had, absolutely, no idea what he was talking about.  
"What?!" I asked again, and he shook me more violently, I guess he thought that I still was dreaming (I wasn't sure if I was, actually).  
"You do know my true identity, don't you? You cooperate with near, don't you?" He asked, this time much clearer. I swallowed hard, and began to mumble.  
"Yes I do cooperate with Near. But I have no idea who you is, I.." If he saw how madly I blushed, I bet he would have laughed his ass off. "I has been watching you..for.. a month" My voice became quieter, and was nearly just a whisper when I stopped talking.

"I know" He just said, like it wasn't weird or anything to be ashamed of at all. "But do you know who I am?" He asked again, and I closed my eyes. "You're Mello?" I asked, and I could feel him sigh on top of me. His weight disappeared from my exhausted body, and he muttered. "You're actually very dumb for being a whammy kid, I just can't believe that you were third. Right after m-" Now it was my turn to straddle his hips, fisting my hands in his shirt..  
"What the hell?" I asked and shook him. "You're Mello, second of all whammy's, who vanished because he didn't want to cooperate with Near?" I grew angrier and angrier as the seconds passed by. "And now you're fucking prostitute!" I finished, and even though it was very dark saw I how Mello clenched his teeth.  
"Have you ever tried to flee from an orphan, just fifteen years old, with no money?" Mello's hands took a not so gentle grip around my wrists. "Where would you go searching for money?"

I let go of his shirt, slowly biting my lower lip. "But.." I whispered breathless. "You can be anything, with your intelligence…" He cut me off at once. "Anything, fifteen years old? And if I became something big Near could find me… and try to make me cooperate again" He mumbled, and I realized that I still straddled his hips. An indiscreet flush spread unto my cheeks. I hurried to get off him, nearly fell off the bed in my desperate attempts. Luckily I had a king-sized bed.

When I laid there beside Mello and stared into the cellar, trying to calm my heart down, I sighed. Even though it was a chance in a million to run into another Whammy kid, I had done it without noticing. And I hadn't run in to just anybody, it was Mello the second rated kid. Who was a prostitute. The whole situation was unbelievable, and I had a slight problem to realize it was actually happening at first. I thought it was a dream. A very realistic dream, since I still could feel him breathe slowly beside me. He seemed calm, and lost in his own thoughts. I wondered for a second if he thought about me, and if he did, how did he think of me? I shook the thought out immediately, telling myself that he probably just thought I was perv. Which I was.

Mellos PoV.

"Have you ever tried to flee from an orphan, just fifteen years old, with no money?" I blurted out, and could see from my angle that his face changed expression. I continued "And if I became something big Near could find me… and try to make me cooperate again" But my voice ended up all quiet and unsteady at the end of the sentence. I stared at him, with my intensive blue eyes which glimmered slightly in the dark. But he didn't look at me, he seemed embarrassed.

I couldn't tell if it was because he was ashamed what he had said, or if it was because he was so close to me. Anyhow, he got off me in such a hurry he nearly fell of the bed. Which made me snicker a little. Even though I had been mad, angry and frustrated just a minute ago I couldn't hate Matt. He was so adorable innocently clumsy, and I could tell that it wasn't just acting.

I admit that I thought that the situation was weird, but really, I'm not easily surprised. I was used to get into situations. I breathed slowly and closed my eyes.

"Sorry"

My voice wasn't more than a whisper, but it felt like it echoed in the small room. A couple of minutes flew by before Matt said, and he sounded confused. " What for?" His voice didn't seem to hold any hidden emotions, it was just plain. I shrugged a little, relaxed in the big comfortable bed. " I.. I guess I was very unthankful earlier, you let me in and I thanked you by sneak through your stuff. " I smiled, and even though I couldn't see his face, I think he did the same. "And I never said Thank you properly". Now it was Matt's turn to shrug slightly as he laughed quietly "Then you shouldn't say sorry, you should just say thank you, shouldn't you?".

I turned my head against his, peered through the darkness so I could see his face. He smiled happily and honest against me. For the first time in years I felt a warm feeling building up inside of me. Oh my god, I thought, I've fallen for him.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4.

Mello's PoV

My heart panicked in my chest, I had fallen for the guy who had helped me. Not that just that detail was weird, I've never been in love. Yes I had had some teenager crushes in my youth, and like the most Whammy kids I had had a secret crush on L. Even though I had just seen him a couple of times as he visited, when he was going through the library for example, I thought that I loved him. Yes, just because I was eleven it didn't mean I wasn't sure about my sexual disposition. Near was probably the only Whammy kid that didn't feel any kind of affection or attraction to the young detective with pitch black hair, sloppy way of walking and panda eyes.

I caught myself drowning in Matt's eyes, and he just continued smiling happily. I swallowed and turned my gaze away, really, I hadn't time for having a crush on my rescuer. I needed to catch Kira, and more urgent, I needed money, food and household. My pride prevented me from asking Matt, I had to do this on my own. But, just sleeping here until my injuries had healed up enough couldn't hurt? Could it?

But I have to be careful, I thought, or I might end up forgetting about my mission, my faith.

"Thank you" I whispered, and yawned heavily, and soon after turned fast asleep in the King-sized bed.

Matt's PoV.

I couldn't breathe, his intensive blue eyes gazed into mine, and I didn't know where to fix my own eyes. He was so beautiful, his skin was flawless and the hair was like gold. I began to breathe when he turned away, and realized that I was still smiling.

Right then couldn't I care less if he thought I was a pervert, or whatever, I was just truly happy. It was enough for me to have him close and that he'd let me help him; I didn't care if he wasn't thankful. I listened to his breaths, imagined how his chest raised up and down since I couldn't see him through the darkness that surrounded us. So, when he whispered, it sounded like he screamed. Or, not really, but you understand what I mean? I was so concentrate on hearing, that his whisper seemed much louder than it actually could have been.

But before I could response I heard how his breaths became deeper, and could feel his body relax against the bed. He was asleep. I couldn't help the smile which was spreading in my face. I inched closer, and slowly got a more detailed vision of the blond. I was just a couple of centimeters away when I stopped, rested my head on one of the pillows. He looked like an angel, the blond locks swirling around his face and the bangs was messed up. His mouth was half open, letting out sighs now and then, his eyelashes was dark against his pale skin.

I reached out and touched his cheek, very lightly. He snored a little, and curled into a ball still on the blankets. It seemed as he froze, so I lurked out the blanket he was laying on and placed it over his body. And since the blanket was big enough for us both I crawled under it as well before I slowly closed my eyes. I felt like an eternity, but now when I think back I guessed it was only one or two minutes, before I fell asleep.

~ Hours later~

I mumbled in my sleep, didn't want to wake up when the sun shone through the lonely window. " Fuck off!" I hissed, reaching for the pillow and putting it over my head. Damn sun, damn morning, damn bed which was too comfortable for my own good. My eyes were just creeks when I peered through them, why weren't the damn curtains closed? When I tried to get up I realized that I wasn't alone in the bed. Following nights events came back as lighting on a bright sky. I blushed slightly as I turned my head towards the sleeping prostitute, who still looked like an angel. He had closed his mouth now, but his cheek was deformed by the pillow which pushed it up, but he was beautiful anyway.

I realized that his hand hold a very strong and definite grip around one of my arms, if I looked closer I could see marks leaved by his nails when he had dug them into my skin. He seemed frightened, and I supposed he had had a bad dream. Not to unlikely according to what he had gone through the other day. I sighed and leaned against him, carefully hugging him so he wouldn't awake. He curled up against my chest and I smiled widely, tried to get those perverted thoughts away.

I sniffed him in his hair, and he smelled like my shampoo. Not so weird, he had taken a shower yesterday. But he also smelled of some strong perfume mixed with his morning breath. Even though I would have called it gross if it was anybody else, I kind of liked the smell.

"I like how you smell" I whispered, and realized I was sick talking to a sleeping person who didn't wake up. I smiled against him, even though he couldn't see me. " I like a lots of things about you" I continued, brushed through his hair with my long fingers. " How you look, your way of talking, the way you walk, your attitude. " I sighed before I spoke again "And even though it might seem as I'm a perv" I stopped to think, and then laughed a little at how silly I were, talking to sleeping people. "Which I might am" I laughed, closed my eyes as I continued "But I will never dream on hurting you" I heard how my voice became serious. "I never want you to be hurt again" I whispered, hugged him closer. " I'm going to take care of you, just wait and see, wait you'll see" I buried my face in his hair.

Mello's PoV

I held in a sob, trying not to make any sounds when he hugged me closer. I blushed heavily but buried my face in his chest, so he wouldn't realize I was awake. Nobody had ever cared this much for a trash like me.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5.

Mello's PoV

I continued to muffle my sobs against the redhead's chest, he was kind of skinny and I could guess he hadn't worked out in a while. But, I couldn't say it was unattractive. I felt how he pulled away carefully, and my heart panicked. His voice was soft when he murmured against my ear

"Mello, It's okay, you're safe".

Oh my god, the thoughts rushed through my mind, he still thought I was sleeping and having a bad dream or something. Could I have more luck? I sobbed again against my will, and buried my face in his chest.

"Mello, wake up" He said calmly, shook me very carefully, like I was a baby or something. I concluded he didn't want to make me up too abruptly. He continued his tries to wake me, and at last I began to open my still watery eyes. The first thing I saw was his honest smile, I melted on the inside. I couldn't think of anything to say, so I remained silent, just gazed into his kind eyes. So dark and different from mine.

"Did you have a bad dream?" He asked, smiling. I nodded slightly and wiped the tears away from my light blue eyes, turned my gaze away as I did. When I turned it back I could see a light blush over Matt's cheeks, and how his mouth was still half open from when he had spoke. I couldn't help the smirk which grew wider in my face, I liked the effect my face had on certain guys. Especially on this Matt guy, who seemed very inexperienced when it came to guys. Or, relationships however. I didn't even know if he had had any kind of relationship, but I would have guessed no according to his behavior when we first met.

But that just made him cuter. I realized I had been smiling the last three minutes, as I drowned in his dark eyes. Hastily I looked away, and sat up in the very comfortable bed. Even though I couldn't see his eyes, I could feel how he examined me with his eyes. I didn't dislike it, but I felt exposed. It felt like he could see into my heart, like he could see how cute I thought he was and that I liked him even though I didn't want him to notice. It would make me vulnerable.

For god sake, I was Mello, the most popular man prostitute in this town, I didn't fell in love. Guys fell in love with me, but I didn't. I was immune, or that was what I wanted to believe.

So many men, who by the way insisted they were straight, had fallen for me. But, the few times I began to believe that they actually cared about me, they broke my heart. They showed my exactly what I was worth, nothing.

I did want to believe that Matt was different, but I couldn't. I had a great defense against my own feelings, so that I wouldn't get hurt when the ones I loved finally abounded me, or betrayed me.

I had lived on my own for such a long time, just had to care about myself. It was hard let anyone else in under my skin, even though I really liked Matt.

Matt's PoV.

Sorry if I keep repeating myself, but he was so utterly beautiful when he wiped his tears away. Vulnerable and strong at the same time. It was weird that I admired him, when I really wanted him to be mine. I was jealous of him, of the attitude that just screamed 'I don't care about you'. He resembled me of a cat. I had had one in Whammy's once, it wasn't just only my cat, but anyway.

He was black, and just walked in and out as he preferred. Ate from the dishes and was nice if you were nice to him. Matt had liked the cat, they were good friends. And sometimes the cat even slept beside him in his bed, watched him as he played his game and purred loud when they cuddled.

But then, the cat disappeared. He didn't die, Matt could have bear that, he had run away. Probably searching for a better home.

Matt sighed and shook out the thoughts about his old friend, instead he watched Mello. He wouldn't let him abound him. I sat up, rose up from the bed.

"Want some coffee?" I asked, itched my neck slightly as I waited for him to answer. He turned his bright blue gaze to meet mine, and smiled adorable.

"Do you have chocolate instead?" He asked carefully and I was stunned for a moment. Mello, chocolate? I laughed in my mind, didn't dare to do it out loud since he would probably kick my ass. He seemed so mature, experienced and non-childish, but still he wanted chocolate instead of coffee?

I nodded and left him in the bedroom as I walked into the kitchen, and breathed heavily out before I started to search after that chocolate powder I knew I had somewhere. I made a lot of noise when I finally found it, up on the highest shelf in the whole kitchen, and I just couldn't understand why I had placed it there. I nearly fell of the chair I stood on when I heard a high pitched peep from a small little mouse which ran by my fingers, just an inch away.

"Freaking mice!" I blurted out and shut and jumped down from the chair with a noisy thud.

I took out milk, and placed it on the kitchen desk. "Hey Mello, come out here and mix it yourself" I said, and heard how he grunted in the bedroom. But not much later I heard the creak from the bed and his footsteps. He rested against the doorframe.

I just looked, stunned. His hair was messy, the blue eyes was just creeks as he peered against me. He had an enormous t-shirt he had borrowed from my wardrobe, and pair of black loose pants. "What?" He asked, and woke me up from my fantasies. That guy really was to hot for his own good.


	6. Chapter 6

Like a total prostitute.

Mello's Pov.

"What?"

I asked kind of annoyed, my morning mood had never been particularly good, or even bearable. When I lived at whammys most of the kids took detours around me, just to avoid my deadly glares. Now when I think about, they didn't just take detours in the mornings, they did it all the time. Well, I guess they were frightened of me, my attitude wasn't that pleasant.

But Matt didn't flinch away, as the kids would have done, a smile did instead replace the dreaming gaze.

"Well"

He said, and moved away from the desk where the milk and chocolate powder stood so I could mix it myself. First I thought he was lazy, but when I thought about it I realized he probably didn't want to do wrong. Everybody wanted different amounts of powder and milk.

Not in the mood of talking, I silently took up the little spoon I was supposed to use to put the powder in the cup. One, two, three, four, five…

When I glanced to the left I saw Matt staring at the cup, which I still was putting powder in.

Matt's PoV

"What are you looking at ?!"

Mello suddenly snapped, and once again I felt embarrassed for my staring. But, this time I hadn't thought about raping him, I silently thought before I shrugged my shoulders.

"Sorry" I apologized, and Mello put the spoon down after the eleventh spoon of chocolate powder. Mello just shrugged his shoulders, and turned against the microwave. He opened it, and placed the cup inside. But after he shut the door, he just looked very confused at the different buttons.

"Oh, let me help you with that!" I said, eagerly to be handy for him.

Mello's PoV

I sighed when I couldn't figure out the darn machine. Suddenly I felt Matt behind my back, and he reached after the buttons on the microwave.

I swallowed at the sudden contact, and felt my heart racing in the chest. A slight flush spread on my cheeks, oh why was god punishing me? Why couldn't I just think of Matt as a friend, why did I need to feel such an attraction towards him! He wasn't even experienced, I could see that.

I, Mello, wasn't just someone who fell in love with just anybody. I chose my clients well, or not all the time (the reason why I was here is a good example). I was even taller than the stupid redhead!

"Is something the matter?"

That stupid voice! GAH!


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7.

Matt's PoV

"Is something the matter?" I murmured, and looked honestly worried. My chest pressed against Mello's back, and I could feel his whole body stiffening. I would have backed away, if I could. But, the kitchen was very small and not so easy to move in.

I pressed a couple of buttons, and the microwave made a weird sound before it began to warm up the milk.

"No, nothing" Mello said, seemed to have forgotten that I had asked him a question. He shrugged his shoulders, and forced himself away from my warm chest. The place where he had been standing suddenly became cold and empty. I missed him already, and turned my head to look after him as he walked into the livingroom, his moving hips attracted my attention immediately.

He almost looked like a girl when I saw him from behind, but his shoulders were a little too broad to belong to a woman. I sighed happily, wished that he would be with me forever, or if that was impossible, for a little while anyway.

I didn't notice when he turned against me, and that's why I didn't saw the smirk which grew wide in his face.

"Checking out my ass, are you?"

Mello's PoV

I lurked out from Matt's grip, couldn't bare his bodywarmth any longer. It made my dizzy.

I walked out to the livingroom, but felt awkwardly observed. I tilted my head slightly and looked over my own shoulder. Matt stood in the doorframe, looked a little hypnotized with his stare fixed at my hips. I could feel the smirk growing in my face, and laughed quietly.

"Checking out my ass, are you?"

I asked, and laughed louder. I raised my eyebrow against him when I saw how his cheeks turned pink. Hastily he looked up, and instead looked me right into my eyes with a dorky smile on his lips. Before I could say anything else, the microwave pinged loudly, and Matt turned around to fetch my cup of chocolate.

I could still see the dorky smile before me. Such cuteness, such innocence.

That guy really hadn't been where I've been, not seen what I've seen. His eyes were still not hurt by the terrible thing, which all the time is happening around us. He hadn't been forced, yet, to open his eyes and realize that this world was rotten.

He hadn't realized that you'll get nothing out of being the good guy, that somebody most surely will take advantage of your kindness. But, somehow, we have to get through life anyway.

"Here" He showed the warm cup into my hands, with another silly smile before he took a sip out of his own cup, which according to the smell was coffee.

"Thanks" My voice was quiet, and filled with thoughts. But, I was happy about being here in Matt's apartment. A place were no evil seemed to exist, and the months I had spent on the street just seemed like an odd nightmare. But, the wounds still hurt and reminded me that it wasn't my imagination, but pure reality.

I placed myself at the couch, blew at the warm liquid, and then sipped carefully. It tasted wonderful. It was years ago I had been drinking chocolate.

"Do you like it?" His honest smile was turned against me again, and the dark eyes resembled me of L for an instance. L was… dead. I swallowed hard, didn't want to think about the murdered detective because I knew it would eventually bring me to tears.

"It's really good, tastes wonderful" I said instead, but could her how shallow my voice was. It sounded so weak, like I was about to cry.

"Are you okay?"

Why did he need to ask med those questions, it made me even more sensitive. I couldn't hold it in when someone, who seemed to care about you, asked you honestly if something was the matter.

"Yeah" I lied, and swallowed again. "Just thought about someone who don't exist anymore"

"Your parents?"

He was curious, but careful when he asked. He didn't want to rush me.

"No, someone I really looked up to."

Matt's Pov.

Someone Mello had looked up to.

I had never been good at comforting people; I had had no time to train that ability since I've been a loner. But, I gave it a try.

I curled up beside him in the sofa, purred softly like a cat and put one arm around him.

"I can be the new someone?" I asked, with a little sparkle in my eyes. " I will never leave you." The last phrase was just a whisper.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8.

**Mello's PoV:**

"I can be that new someone.." Matt's voice was only a whisper, a careful caring whisper. At that moment I realized Matt would never intentionally hurt me. I fell asleep, before answering and still with teardrops on my cheeks. I don't know how long I was asleep, probably for an hour or two.

As the days went by, I became stronger and healthier. My wounds healed fast, and soon I had no problem with walking. But the wounds on my back would leave a permanent scar.

When I lived so close to another human being I realized the value of company. Ever since Whammy's, or rather; ever since my competition between Near began, I've never prioritized friendship. I thought friends would just get in the way. But as I from day to day talked and got to know Matt, who I soon discovered nor was stupid or a rapist on the other hand; he was smart and caring (a little socially unused and awkward sometimes, but that's all.), the more addicted of him I became. Not that we slept together – Not in the same bed or had sex. I just wanted him to be there. As a friend.

Not that I would've complained if he took that goddamn step and kissed me (Since he obviously wanted it). But, as I said before, it would just be… troublesome. And, since I knew that we would go separate ways sooner or later, it would hurt a whole lot of hell more if we were lovers.

**Matt's PoV. **

When Mello fell asleep in my arms I carried him to the bedroom as I went to sleep in the couch. After that day we never talked about that incident. We never really talked actually, in my opinion. Or, we talked sure, but not about us. Not about my feelings.

But I can't blame him? – Since, why would he randomly ask me about my feelings when I clearly showed no interest in that kind of talk. I can admit that I was afraid, frightened and completely scared shitless. To socialize at daily basis were enough challenge.

I've never had a relationship, never had a lover. I once kissed a girl at whammy's, when a couple of boys made me, but I was not more than 10 years old.

As the days went by my stiffness and tensed attitude loosened up. Soon I didn't even thought about it anymore, and talked to Mello as we had known each other for centuries. I liked him, maybe more than a friend, but I would never risk our friendship for something as stupid as that. Mello was clearly intelligent, he was smart. But still I wondered why he had put himself through being a prostitute. A normal teenager, or young man whatever, would never even think of it as an option. Mello most certainly carried a burning hatred for himself. He just couldn't see the good in himself.

**Mello's PoV. **

Not too soon I understood that I had to go. I couldn't stay in Matt's apartment any longer. I had a quest, my destiny waited for me. I had to do it. Even though it would bring me pain and sorrow, I had to. Why? Because I deserved it.

I've never cared for anyone, this was before Matt came along however, and nobody ever cared for me. Since the day of my birth no one ever wanted me. That's why I had to fight for my place in this world, I did not deserve it. I had to prove myself better than that damn albino, or I would not be worth my spared life.

As I, as quiet as possible, sneaked through the smoky that was even dirtier than before I arrived apartment I took a last glance at what I was going to leave behind. That couch I've slept on the last three weeks, the kitchen which I knew as good as my own pocket by now and that door which led into Matt's bedroom where Matt at the moment still was sleeping. That's was what I thought however.

When I took the first step into the hallway a sharp light suddenly flashed me. Someone had flickered on the lights.

"Did you think you could just sneak away in the middle of the night?" I couldn't mistake that voice. Matt.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9.

**Matt's PoV**

I knew this was coming. Even though Mello might thought he was good at hiding stuff he wasn't; however not when it concerned me. I wasn't sure on which night he would chose for his sneaky runaway, but his allover suspicious behavior made me sure.

I wasn't mad. Maybe disappointed, but somehow I understood the blond. I've come to realize he never been god at making friends, nor keeping them. He has a violent attitude which can scare away event the friendliest. Why I didn't kick him out?

I guess that he was different to me, since I knew something about him. Firstly I knew something about his past that he likely would like to forget, and secondly I've seen him in his most vulnerable state; So hurt that he couldn't walk straight for a couple of days. Even though I didn't act like I had it, I had power. I had the power to make Mello nervous, to make him listen and open himself up for me.

"I'm not angry.." I said, and saw how Mello like a gloomy teenager who just been caught with sneaking out leaned against the wall with his eyes on his boots.

**Mello's PoV**

Seriously; this guy was hopeless. Or rather that I couldn't bring myself to burst out and slam the door in his face were irritating and a little frightening I guess. I swallowed hard as I bet my lower lip and slowly scratched my neck nervously. What was I supposed to say? Or do?

"You can't come with me.." I said, brushing a couple of strands of my blonde hair from my eyes. "Just face it, you're not cut out to follow me. You've never seen what I've seen, never been where I've been. "

When I glanced up I could see Matt's hurt face. What I've said wasn't even completely true, he had gone through similar stuff, since he also was a whammy kid. But, I swallowed down the empathy. I didn't have the time. As he stayed completely silent I became more uncomfortable I appeared. At last I began to speak, since that's what I thought he wanted me too.

"Matt.." I sighed, but before I could continue my sentence he also sighed out. But instead he said; "Mello.."

I let him speak, since I wasn't sure about what I would say anyway.

"I don't care if I can't come with you, since I would be in the way as a Lover. " My eyes snapped opened.

**Matt's PoV.**

"I don't care if I can't come with you, since I would be in the way as a lover"

I don't even know where the courage came from, I just said it. And before Mello could say anything else I continued my rant. "But that doesn't change the fact that I care for you – And I will not just let you die. So I don't care what you say, I will come with you. As a friend. "

Mello chocked slightly as he straightened out his back and walked slowly against me. His voice purred slightly when he moved away a strand of his hair away from his eyes, and smiled mischievously.

"I've never said that I didn't want you to be my lover.."

My whole body shivered as he pressed his own against mine, clutching my wrists with his leather coated fingers.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10. **

**Matt's Pov**

I could hardly think, nor react, when Mello pressed his own leather clothed body against my own (But, I didn't wear leather though. Just a striped shirt with my favorite pair of jeans – That's me). My voiced hitched, like I still was a young teenager – Like I still was in young puberty. But I wasn't.

I always tried to tell myself that I was fully developed, even though I still wasn't eighteen. I wanted to grow up so fast, moved from Whammy's half a year from then.

I swallowed hard when the one year older, or actually just a couple of months older, blond breathed heavily against my sensitive neck. He still purred slightly, like he enjoyed the power he had over me. His grip and actions seemed a little, uncontrolled maybe even drunk. But since I knew I didn't have any alcohol at home - I calculated he was intoxicated by me.

"Silly Mattie" He purred with a naughty smirk over his lips. The very same lips slowly traveled up to my ear, kissed it as my breath became shallower. "Who said I didn't want you as my lover?"

When I felt a leather cloaked hand reach for my neck, caressing gently before taking a harder grip. I didn't want this to begin this way. And I certainly didn't think Mello could be so possessive, not against me however. I shivered and tried once again to push the other part away, but both Mello and my own will prevented me. My eyes traveled slowly up to meet his, his astonishing eyes. To regain a little of the courage I've had earlier I took a deep breath; Thinking through my position and options.

_This isn't so bad, actually. _I thought right before I made my move.

**Mello's PoV.**

I had no idea what I was doing. No_ fucking_ idea. But my whole body acted on its own, grinding against poor Matt. It was like the _old_ me had taken over. Or, more like, the _bad _me. The one that killed people, the one that held up the surface while I spent time with the mafia. I didn't mean it – Oh, well … I had feelings for Matt. I had stated that long ago - but I didn't want it to start out this way. I didn't want to force him into this.

My whole body was stiff and on the wait: prepared for anything. Nothing would surprise me more than the exact thing Matt chose to do.

His legs shifted, his hands searching for steady positions on the wall – before he heaved himself up. One of his bare hands took a grip around my neck, the other still stayed on the wall. Under the whole action I just stood there paralyzed, unable to move. His eyes glanced up and met mine for a millisecond. He didn't even seem the slightest uncertain – which made me unbalanced, not only literally.

He pushed himself up. Placing a soft kiss on my lips. At first I didn't even kiss back, but at least I placed my hands at his back. Hugging him softly and slowly began to kiss back.

**Matt's PoV**

I had no idea what I was expecting from Mello when I pressed my lips against his. I just did it without further planning: I only figured it would please me. So I did it.

_I did it! _


	11. I'm sorry

**I'M SO SORRY! **

Last week my computer died, and all the pictures, movies, anime, textdocuments, fanfics and music went with it. They could fix the computer (Thankfully) but all the stuff on it disappeared. They actually had a chance of saving it, but I didn't have the money.

So, I don't know WHEN or IF I'm going to continue these fanfics. I really don't want my hard work to be in vain and you reviewers and subscribers to be disappointed.

I think I will contiune these, sooner or later:

_No Dance On Roses _

_Stories of a Boy_

_Forgotten Chocolate_

_And Notes. _

_This is not a promise though. _

I'm going to post this in all the fanfics I have, cuz' nobody reads my profile anyway.

Lots of Love – Duckie xxx


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